It’s the Indian food when I’m overseas that is way more volatile. There’s just something in the spices or curries that is unpredictable. Because when I’m in Qatar and Kuwait I’m almost always being fed Indian food (many of my partners are Indian) and have had . . . shall we say . . . an “incident” or two, I actually keep one set of fresh underwear clean and neatly folded in my briefcase. Just in case.
A friend of mine has named this condition “Spicy Hole”.
A friend of mine has named this condition “Spicy Hole”.
Never trust a fart.
Ever.
[reply]A friend of mine has named this condition “Spicy Hole”.
Never trust a fart.
Ever.[/reply]
There’s nothing worse than walking about in stifling heat and humidity with a crippling hangover and the knowledge that the slightest arse-slip will see you shitting yourself in public. A walk that normally takes 30 minutes becomes an hour-long ordeal, done in slow, shuffling mini-steps with maximum clenching.
There’s nothing worse than walking about in stifling heat and humidity with a crippling hangover and the knowledge that the slightest arse-slip will see you shitting yourself in public. A walk that normally takes 30 minutes becomes an hour-long ordeal, done in slow, shuffling mini-steps with maximum clenching.
HAHA!!! And typically mundane conditions become crazy obstacles.
“OH NO!!! STEPS!!!”
[reply]
There’s nothing worse than walking about in stifling heat and humidity with a crippling hangover and the knowledge that the slightest arse-slip will see you shitting yourself in public. A walk that normally takes 30 minutes becomes an hour-long ordeal, done in slow, shuffling mini-steps with maximum clenching.
HAHA!!! And typically mundane conditions become crazy obstacles.
“OH NO!!! STEPS!!!”[/reply]
Ha, yeah, steps are negotiated by gripping the rail and taking it one step at a time. Sometimes it helps to press your back against the wall and walk down sideways, like some kind of crab (who’s afraid of shitting itself).
Tell the poop story Pinz!
Tell the poop story Pinz!
You’d have to narrow that down a bit. I’ve got 3 or 4 good ones.
[reply]Tell the poop story Pinz!
You’d have to narrow that down a bit. I’ve got 3 or 4 good ones.[/reply]
The awesome one that got published where you were working in the Chinese or Japanese restaurant.
[reply][reply]Tell the poop story Pinz!
You’d have to narrow that down a bit. I’ve got 3 or 4 good ones.[/reply]
The awesome one that got published where you were working in the Chinese or Japanese restaurant.[/reply]
Gotcha. It was lost for all time for a while when Myspace took a big dump (Hiiiiiyyyyooo!!! Bad pun alert!) but I think I found a way to recover it.
[reply][reply][reply]Tell the poop story Pinz!
You’d have to narrow that down a bit. I’ve got 3 or 4 good ones.[/reply]
The awesome one that got published where you were working in the Chinese or Japanese restaurant.[/reply]
Gotcha. It was lost for all time for a while when Myspace took a big dump (Hiiiiiyyyyooo!!! Bad pun alert!) but I think I found a way to recover it.[/reply]
I have it. Give me the go ahead and I will publish that wonderful piece of literature…
I was able to retrieve it and will post it myself. I have no problem with people sharing my stuff wherever, but it’s been a while since I’ve looked at this one and already see some mistakes – I get irritated if I can’t correct stupid typos and such, so I’ll just post it myself.
I was able to retrieve it and will post it myself. I have no problem with people sharing my stuff wherever, but it’s been a while since I’ve looked at this one and already see some mistakes – I get irritated if I can’t correct stupid typos and such, so I’ll just post it myself.
Haha awesome! I think it deserves a thread of it’s own due to the awesome-ness of it.
Okay. Maybe I’ll make a stories thread.
I don’t really recall how the FBTE tour thread ended up with me talking about soiling myself, so a new thread would likely be appropriate anyway.
I hope he does tour since I missed the Relapse one.
Did anyone call THIS one? I know we had a bunch of retarded TOUR puns, and I think all of ours were a lot better, actually, but . . . . yeah . . . . this was just announced . . .
From the Ministry FB page . . .
“Hey kiddies, stay tuned for more exciting Ministry
news…From Beer to EternaTour updates. Yes, you heard it here first…The tour will be called From Beer to EternaTour.”
UGGGGHHHH!!! That tour name is so retarded (or am I supposed to say ReTOURded?) that it’s actually making me mad.
I don’t ever buy shirts at the shows anyway, but having that on any shirt would ruin it.
I’m just . . . embarrassed.
Yes, I’m going. Absolutely. I can’t wait. But that name . . . oh, that awful awful name. AAAAARRRRGGGHHH!!!
They would have to be in SF or, at the very farthest, Sacramento for me to even consider it.
With the new album title, we’re perilously close to having a “From Beer to E-TOUR-nity,” instead of the witty gross-out pun that we so richly deserve.
And the winner is. . . Tomasz!!!
(See page 1 of this thread, dated May 31st)
Tomasz, come up and accept your award. You’ll be getting a 13th Planet gift bag consisting of:
-a guitar pick almost used by Al on the recording of Relapse.
-Al’s Santa hat from that stupid Christmas video.
-A bumper sticker that says “I Got Album Title Puns Coming Out My Asshole”.
-Royalty checks made out to some guy named Paul Barker that aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on.
Make sure that gift bag also includes a download code so he can get access to a digital copy of the exclusive limited edition movie “The Making Of The 13th Planet Gift Bag”.
Congratulations, Tomazs!!!