[indent]If you just opened this like I told you to, tie yourself down to whatever chair you’re sitting in, because this email is going to be a rough fucking ride.
For those of you that have your heads stuck under rocks, which apparently is the majority of this chapter, we have been FUCKING UP in terms of night time events and general social interactions with Sigma Nu. I’ve been getting texts on texts about people LITERALLY being so fucking AWKWARD and so fucking BORING. If you’re reading this right now and saying to yourself “But oh em gee Julia, I’ve been having so much fun with my sisters this week!”, then punch yourself in the face right now so that I don’t have to fucking find you on campus to do it myself.
I do not give a flying fuck, and Sigma Nu does not give a flying fuck, about how much you fucking love to talk to your sisters. You have 361 days out of the fucking year to talk to sisters, and this week is NOT, I fucking repeat NOT ONE OF THEM. This week is about fostering relationships in the greek community, and that’s not fucking possible if you’re going to stand around and talk to each other and not our matchup. Newsflash you stupid cocks: FRATS DON’T LIKE BORING SORORITIES. Oh wait, DOUBLE FUCKING NEWSFLASH: SIGMA NU IS NOT GOING TO WANT TO HANG OUT WITH US IF WE FUCKING SUCK, which by the way in case you’re an idiot and need it spelled out for you, WE FUCKING SUCK SO FAR. This also applies to you little shits that have talked openly about post gaming at a different frat IN FRONT OF SIGMA NU BROTHERS. Are you people fucking retarded? That’s not a rhetorical question, I LITERALLY want you to email me back telling me if you’re mentally slow so I can make sure you don’t go to anymore night time events. If Sigma Nu openly said “Yeah we’re gonna invite Zeta over”, would you be happy? WOULD YOU? No you wouldn’t, so WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO IT TO THEM?? IN FRONT OF THEM?!! First of all, you SHOULDN’T be post gaming at other frats, I don’t give a FUCK if your boyfriend is in it, if your brother is in it, or if your entire family is in that frat. YOU DON’T GO. YOU. DON’T. GO. And you ESPECIALLY do fucking NOT convince other girls to leave with you.
“But Julia!”, you say in a whiny little bitch voice to your computer screen as you read this email, “I’ve been cheering on our teams at all the sports, doesn’t that count for something?” NO YOU STUPID FUCKING ASS HATS, IT FUCKING DOESN’T. DO YOU WANNA KNOW FUCKING WHY?!! IT DOESN’T COUNT BECAUSE YOU’VE BEEN FUCKING UP AT SOBER FUCKING EVENTS TOO. I’ve not only gotten texts about people being fucking WEIRD at sports (for example, being stupid shits and saying stuff like “durr what’s kickball?” is not fucking funny), but I’ve gotten texts about people actually cheering for the opposing team. The opposing. Fucking. Team. ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?!! I don’t give a SHIT about sportsmanship, YOU CHEER FOR OUR GODDAMN TEAM AND NOT THE OTHER ONE, HAVE YOU NEVER BEEN TO A SPORTS GAME? ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND? Or are you just so fucking dense about what it means to make people like you that you think being a good little supporter of the greek community is going to make our matchup happy? Well it’s time someone told you, NO ONE FUCKING LIKES THAT, ESPECIALLY OUR FUCKING MATCHUP. I will fucking cunt punt the next person I hear about doing something like that, and I don’t give a fuck if you SOR me, I WILL FUCKING ASSAULT YOU.
“Ohhh Julia, I’m now crying because your email has made me oh so so sad”. Well good. If this email applies to you in any way, meaning if you are a little asswipe that stands in the corners at night or if you’re a weird shit that does weird shit during the day, this following message is for you:
DO NOT GO TO TONIGHT’S EVENT.
I’m not fucking kidding. Don’t go. Seriously, if you have done ANYTHING I’ve mentioned in this email and have some rare disease where you’re unable to NOT do these things, then you are HORRIBLE, I repeat, HORRIBLE PR FOR THIS CHAPTER. I would rather have 40 girls that are fun, talk to boys, and not fucking awkward than 80 that are fucking faggots. If you are one of the people that have told me “Oh nooo boo hoo I can’t talk to boys I’m too sober”, then I pity you because I don’t know how you got this far in life, and with that in mind don’t fucking show up unless you’re going to stop being a goddamn cock block for our chapter. Seriously. I swear to fucking God if I see anyone being a goddamn boner at tonight’s event, I will tell you to leave even if you’re sober. I’m not even kidding. Try me.
And for those of you who are offended at this email, I would apologize but I really don’t give a fuck. Go fuck yourself. [/indent]
There is no way a chick wrote that.
Late,
grmpysmrf
It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
I seriously doubt it. I don’t know the meanest chick that would use half that language let alone write it. It might be posted under a chick but I would bet a frat boy wrote it.
Late,
grmpysmrf
There is no way a chick wrote that.
Late,
grmpysmrf
there is very much so a way.
maybe we have met different girls, but swearing, anger, and viciousness isnt something only males are partial to sometimes.
Yeah, there’s nothing about this that would make me think it wasn’t written by a female.
Ever gotten an angry text from an upset girlfriend who is tired of your bullshit after you’ve gone on for months doing stupid little things and then pulled some serious shit at an event or something that was important to her? This reads like one of those long, scary, terrifying, nerve-racking texts.
Shit gets real and it gets real fast.
She can take her hyper aggressive attitude and shove it up her jacksy. If most of these girls are retiring types maybe the email’s author can find a different sorority where she can be an ass.
She sounds like a girl who might be loud during the business. One word: GAG
[reply]It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
I seriously doubt it. I don’t know the meanest chick that would use half that language let alone write it. It might be posted under a chick but I would bet a frat boy wrote it.
Late,
grmpysmrf[/reply]
are you shitting me?! that’s pretty fucking sexist of you. women could be just as vulgar as men.
and this is what’s wrong with american society. these people should all be rounded up and put into a fucking gulag. seriously, they need some hard labour. that whole culture of frats and sororities is fucking disgusting. luckily we don’t have that shit in canada. i mean, we do, but it’s nothing like it is there. they’re conditioned to become brainless sheeple. the worse part is it’s these fuck tards that end up in important positions later in life, whether is be government or private. depressing.
[reply]There is no way a chick wrote that.
Late,
grmpysmrf
there is very much so a way.
maybe we have met different girls, but swearing, anger, and viciousness isnt something only males are partial to sometimes.[/reply]
Swearing anger and viciousness are certainly traits women can have but they usally have a different “brand” (lack of a better word) of it. It presents itself differently.
Late,
grmpysmrf
[reply][reply]It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
I seriously doubt it. I don’t know the meanest chick that would use half that language let alone write it. It might be posted under a chick but I would bet a frat boy wrote it.
Late,
grmpysmrf[/reply]
are you shitting me?! that’s pretty fucking sexist of you. women could be just as vulgar as men.
and this is what’s wrong with american society. these people should all be rounded up and put into a fucking gulag. seriously, they need some hard labour. that whole culture of frats and sororities is fucking disgusting. luckily we don’t have that shit in canada. i mean, we do, but it’s nothing like it is there. they’re conditioned to become brainless sheeple. the worse part is it’s these fuck tards that end up in important positions later in life, whether is be government or private. depressing.[/reply]
It has nothing to do with sexist. It has to do with continual obeservation of women’s (of all ages) behavior/speech patterns. Yeah maybe a chick did write it but if I were in vegas there is no way I would put money on it. That tirade, specifically the vocabulary, comes out of dudes mouth’s… on a regular basis not women.
Late,
grmpysmrf
and this is what’s wrong with american society. these people should all be rounded up and put into a fucking gulag. seriously, they need some hard labour. that whole culture of frats and sororities is fucking disgusting. luckily we don’t have that shit in canada. i mean, we do, but it’s nothing like it is there. they’re conditioned to become brainless sheeple. the worse part is it’s these fuck tards that end up in important positions later in life, whether is be government or private. depressing.
To write this is to miss the point of of frats and sororities. That’s all they are are networking clubs.
Late,
grmpysmrf
[reply][reply]It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
I seriously doubt it. I don’t know the meanest chick that would use half that language let alone write it. It might be posted under a chick but I would bet a frat boy wrote it.
Late,
grmpysmrf[/reply]
are you shitting me?! that’s pretty fucking sexist of you. women could be just as vulgar as men.
and this is what’s wrong with american society. these people should all be rounded up and put into a fucking gulag. seriously, they need some hard labour. that whole culture of frats and sororities is fucking disgusting. luckily we don’t have that shit in canada. i mean, we do, but it’s nothing like it is there. they’re conditioned to become brainless sheeple. the worse part is it’s these fuck tards that end up in important positions later in life, whether is be government or private. depressing.[/reply]
The problem is holier-than-thou preachy assholes who are overly concerned about PC bullshit like someone being “sexist” and then in the same rant state how people should be rounded up and then put into a fucking gulag. What a stupid thing to say on your part.
Great. Stay in Canada and keep bitching about how shitty America is and how much better it is there. I’m glad you’re under the impression that the same shit doesn’t exist there to the same extent.
And anyone who uses the term “sheeple” should immediately be kicked out of and not taken seriously in any conversation. You’re no more aware than anyone else, despite what you think.
[reply][reply][reply]It’s a chick…love the cunt-punt line!!!
I seriously doubt it. I don’t know the meanest chick that would use half that language let alone write it. It might be posted under a chick but I would bet a frat boy wrote it.
Late,
grmpysmrf[/reply]
are you shitting me?! that’s pretty fucking sexist of you. women could be just as vulgar as men.
and this is what’s wrong with american society. these people should all be rounded up and put into a fucking gulag. seriously, they need some hard labour. that whole culture of frats and sororities is fucking disgusting. luckily we don’t have that shit in canada. i mean, we do, but it’s nothing like it is there. they’re conditioned to become brainless sheeple. the worse part is it’s these fuck tards that end up in important positions later in life, whether is be government or private. depressing.[/reply]
The problem is holier-than-thou preachy assholes who are overly concerned about PC bullshit like someone being “sexist” and then in the same rant state how people should be rounded up and then put into a fucking gulag. What a stupid thing to say on your part.
Great. Stay in Canada and keep bitching about how shitty America is and how much better it is there. I’m glad you’re under the impression that the same shit doesn’t exist there to the same extent.
And anyone who uses the term “sheeple” should immediately be kicked out of and not taken seriously in any conversation. You’re no more aware than anyone else, despite what you think.[/reply]
hate it break it to you, but thinking it can’t be a woman because of the vulgarity definitely is sexist, no matter what you may think :P. the gulag was obviously a joke. i just meant these people (for the most part) could use some humbling back breaking labour in their life.
hahah it doesn’t? as i said, of course we have frats and sororities, but it’s nothing like it is there. it’s a completely different culture.
if you’re denying the existence of sheeple, then you’re just being silly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NcLNoxiPBk
hate it break it to you, but thinking it can’t be a woman because of the vulgarity definitely is sexist, no matter what you may think :P. the gulag was obviously a joke. i just meant these people (for the most part) could use some humbling back breaking labour in their life.
hahah it doesn’t? as i said, of course we have frats and sororities, but it’s nothing like it is there. it’s a completely different culture.
if you’re denying the existence of sheeple, then you’re just being silly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NcLNoxiPBk
It may very well sound sexist but when you accuse someone of being sexist and then go off and talk about putting people into a gulag, joking or not, it does come off a wee bit hypocritical and silly.
How do you know they’re nothing like they are here? I’m actually very curious. Have you spent much time here (certainly enough to make such claims) or lived here in the past?
Come on, man. Don’t counter my mocking you for using the word “sheeple” with some conspiracy theory youtube video made by some dude in his mom’s basement.
[reply]hate it break it to you, but thinking it can’t be a woman because of the vulgarity definitely is sexist, no matter what you may think :P. the gulag was obviously a joke. i just meant these people (for the most part) could use some humbling back breaking labour in their life.
hahah it doesn’t? as i said, of course we have frats and sororities, but it’s nothing like it is there. it’s a completely different culture.
if you’re denying the existence of sheeple, then you’re just being silly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NcLNoxiPBk
It may very well sound sexist but when you accuse someone of being sexist and then go off and talk about putting people into a gulag, joking or not, it does come off a wee bit hypocritical and silly.
How do you know they’re nothing like they are here? I’m actually very curious. Have you spent much time here (certainly enough to make such claims) or lived here in the past?
Come on, man. Don’t counter my mocking you for using the word “sheeple” with some conspiracy theory youtube video made by some dude in his mom’s basement.[/reply]
i’ve lived in the states for about 2 years, and went to school there in grade 4. my brother lives there, as well as several cousins etc. i also read a lot of news/articles. not saying i’m an expert, but i’ve been exposed to it.
did you even bother to listen?
[reply][reply]hate it break it to you, but thinking it can’t be a woman because of the vulgarity definitely is sexist, no matter what you may think :P. the gulag was obviously a joke. i just meant these people (for the most part) could use some humbling back breaking labour in their life.
hahah it doesn’t? as i said, of course we have frats and sororities, but it’s nothing like it is there. it’s a completely different culture.
if you’re denying the existence of sheeple, then you’re just being silly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NcLNoxiPBk
It may very well sound sexist but when you accuse someone of being sexist and then go off and talk about putting people into a gulag, joking or not, it does come off a wee bit hypocritical and silly.
How do you know they’re nothing like they are here? I’m actually very curious. Have you spent much time here (certainly enough to make such claims) or lived here in the past?
Come on, man. Don’t counter my mocking you for using the word “sheeple” with some conspiracy theory youtube video made by some dude in his mom’s basement.[/reply]
i’ve lived in the states for about 2 years, and went to school there in grade 4. my brother lives there, as well as several cousins etc. i also read a lot of news/articles. not saying i’m an expert, but i’ve been exposed to it.
did you even bother to listen?[/reply]
So, you lived here for 2 years when you were quite young and have relatives who live here… and read “a lot of news/articles”? Okay. If you’re not an expert then stop trying to sound like one or at least stop generalizing like you are.
I got about a minute in and turned it off. I’ve seen it all before. Preachy youtube video, obnoxious know-it-all narrator rants about how powerless/brainwashed everyone is, dramatic music, “obedience”, clip from Schindler’s List at the very beginning (real subtle) with various other movie clips scattered throughout. Pretty standard.
hate it break it to you, but thinking it can’t be a woman because of the vulgarity definitely is sexist, no matter what you may think :P.
No it’s not. That is not typical women’s vernacular. That does not make it sexist. It just is what it is.
Late,
grmpysmrf
Crazy atom, i just had a rant about some idiot and his use of ‘sheeple’ huh.
It’s real, grmpy.
The president of the sorority tried to get Gawker to remove, but didn’t try to pretend it was fake. Get over yourself. You’re wrong.
a chick may have gotten the credit for it but a dude wrote it. I’m totally right
Late,
grmpysmrf