Goddammit.
It’s not like I was constipated or anything, it just fucking happened. And it hurts.
God I hope it’s gone by Thursday. I don’t want to go out on a date with an aching anus. That’s the sort of thing that should happen BECAUSE of a date.
How does one get haemorrhoids?
How does one get haemorrhoids?
screw the haemorrhoids, how does one go about getting this thing called a “date”?
How does one get haemorrhoids?
Taking it up the jacksy and driving a truck for extended periods of time are the common causes… I’m told.
There’s my problem. I take it up the jacksy and drive a truck at the same time.
But supposedly you get them from being constipated/straining on the toilet, but I was doing neither. It just sort of spontaneously happened.
As for the date, I got it the old fashioned way - I met her on myspace.
inactivity and sitting for prolonged periods don’t help.
go run some laps.and while you’re out, pick up some baby wipes. they help.
I’M SERIOUS.
inactivity and sitting for prolonged periods don’t help.
go run some laps.and while you’re out, pick up some baby wipes. they help.
I’M SERIOUS.
ed is absolutely right. Anyone that has had a pregnant wife/girlfriend will know baby wipes are good for hemorrhoids…
entertaining.
Hemorrhoids don’t suck! They bleed! [laugh] And yeah, those Stupid moist Towelettes that those dumb bears sell on the commercials are a godsend!
Late,
grmpysmrf
I use baby wipes and don’t even have hemorrhoids… those things are a godsend and haven’t had monkey ass in years from cheap dry paper
This thread is the first time I heard of such a thing as baby wipes, I’m gonna go out and buy some, see what my ass thinks of them. Are they all nice and refreshing?
The Sears catalog worked for my grandpappy and it works for me!
"you don’t know how to use the shells?
"you don’t know how to use the shells?
“HA HA He doesn’t know how to use the shells!”
Late,
grmpysmrf
Rofl… I spent years wondering wtf the sea shell joke was about because I was too young at the time to see the movie and my uncles were joking about the sea shells. It all seemed very intriguing. Then of course I saw it and thought I was missing out on some important humor because I didnt know how the stupid sea shells were supposed to work.
They never go away, just shrink and get irritated again. Exercise and no alcohol. Baby wipes rule too. Why should babies get all the superior wiping technologies?
It’s driving me nuts. Particularly since I exercise at least 4 days a week, eat plenty of fiber (or so I thought), etc. so it’s not like I was high risk or anything.
Supposedly they last 1-2 weeks, and it hasn’t even been a week yet.
Goddammit.
I think you non americans may not have heard of baby wipes due to you guys having those beday (spelling?) thingies… we don’t… so we got basically a cross between a wet piece of toilet paper and a wet paper towel, not too moist that it’s icky and not too flimsy paper that the wetness destroys it
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That sound you just heard was the sound of this forum hitting a new low.
Always happy to be of service.