T’was 2007 and all through the year
Not a creature was buying this climate of fear
The stockings were hung in a foreclosure scare
In hopes that the Banks would forget we were there!
The soldiers were nestled all snug in their beds
While visions of extended tours messed with their heads
And Dick and Lynn Cheney with shotguns in lap
Had just pardoned Scooter for shutting his yap
When down at the White House there arose such a clatter
I sprang out the door to see what was the matter!
Away to the protest I flew like a flash
I marched for a while and got tazed in the clash
Then soon I was arrested – for what I don’t know
But the ACLU said that “This just won’t go!”
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a miniature Cheney and eight dead reindeer
With his pacemaker pumping, so lively and quick
I knew in a moment it must be St. Dick!
Faster than subpoenas, his minions they came
He waterboarded and tortured and called them by name:
“Now Halliburton! Now Exxon! Now Conoco! Now Shell!
On Blackwater! On Bechtel! – Let’s all go to Hell!”
To the top of the West Wing, to the top of The Wall
“Now stash away! Stash away! Stash way All!”
As voters are wondering why their vote doesn’t fly
Here comes Karl Rove and he’ll tell you why
So up to the White House the CEOs flew
With a sleighful of cash and Dick Cheney too!
And then, in a twinkling I heard on the roof
Was the hemming and hawing of the ultimate Goof (heh heh heh heh)
I raised just one finger and jumped all around
Coz there on the roof Ol “Dubya” came round
He was dressed all in fur that Cheney had killed
He looked rather dapper on the taxpayers’ bill
A bundle of cash he had flung on his back
Looked happy as Cheney right before an attack
His eyes — how they twinkled, but his manners were weary
Coz Alberto Gonzales has so much to bury!
His droll little mouth was drawn up in a sneer
Like all of those press conferences he holds so dear
The stump of a crack pipe he held in his teeth
He said: “Laura, I’m sorry! I’ve relapsed — I’m weak!”
And his friend had a Wide Stance and a little round belly
That shook when he laughed in a toilet so smelly
Dim-witted and dumb a right jolly old elf
And I laughed when I saw him, giving way my own stealth
A wink of his eye and a snap of his finger
Soon gave me to know I shouldn’t loiter or linger
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work
Put the cash in his stockings, then turned with a jerk
And laying his finger aside of his nose
Thumbs up! And a nod for the coke that he chose
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle
"And away to Iran like a nuclear missile!’
But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight:
“Happy Christmas to no one — Impeachment’s not right!”
Twas the night b4 christmas and all through the house
Sat an old has-been rocker and his rock groupie spouse.
The empty wine bottles and an old distortion box,
Were strewn across the room along with fake dread-locks
Armed with a new album that truly did stink,
He lifted his wine bottle and said with a wink,
“This new album of mine, it’s the heaviest yet!
One listen and the piss army girls will surely be wet!
The piss army boys too, will eat it all up,
Salivating to the generic guitar riffs like Pavlovian pups!”
With delusional grandeur, and plenty of gall,
The old man got greedy and decided to sue Paul!
“That tired old chump was just a bass player,
While my ingenious guitar riffs are better than Slayer!
Ministry is MY baby, I deserve all the cred!"
Said the drunken old wino to himself in his head…
“Fuck Scaccia, Fuck Reiflin, Fuck Connelly, Fuck Paul! Fuck Warner Brother Records, hey Fuck’em All!”
meh, thats all I got for now…
LOL
[:)][:)][:)]
Seriously, Al does think about topics other than Bush.
WHEN - I HAVE NO IDEA…
1002
[quote]Repugnant Pete[/reply]
That’s pretty damn good if it’s off the top of your head…
Late,
grmpysmrf
Thanks! It took my like 10 mins.
Merry Christmas all!
Twas the night b4 christmas and all through the house
Sat an old has-been rocker and his rock groupie spouse.
The empty wine bottles and an old distortion box,
Were strewn across the room along with fake dread-locks
Armed with a new album that truly did stink,
He lifted his wine bottle and said with a wink,
“This new album of mine, it’s the heaviest yet!
One listen and the piss army girls will surely be wet!
The piss army boys too, will eat it all up,
Salivating to the generic guitar riffs like Pavlovian pups!”
With delusional grandeur, and plenty of gall,
The old man got greedy and decided to sue Paul!
“That tired old chump was just a bass player,
While my ingenious guitar riffs are better than Slayer!
Ministry is MY baby, I deserve all the cred!"
Said the drunken old wino to himself in his head…
“Fuck Scaccia, Fuck Reiflin, Fuck Connelly, Fuck Paul! Fuck Warner Brother Records, hey Fuck’em All!”
meh, thats all I got for now…
I dunno if the original post is on the PA board, but it would be hilarious if you posted yours as a reply. You have to do it, please.
I dunno if the original post is on the PA board, but it would be hilarious if you posted yours as a reply. You have to do it, please.
Instant banning!!![:)]
Late,
grmpysmrf
Twas the night b4 christmas and all through the house
Sat an old has-been rocker and his rock groupie spouse.
The empty wine bottles and an old distortion box,
Were strewn across the room along with fake dread-locks
Armed with a new album that truly did stink,
He lifted his wine bottle and said with a wink,
“This new album of mine, it’s the heaviest yet!
One listen and the piss army girls will surely be wet!
The piss army boys too, will eat it all up,
Salivating to the generic guitar riffs like Pavlovian pups!”
With delusional grandeur, and plenty of gall,
The old man got greedy and decided to sue Paul!
“That tired old chump was just a bass player,
While my ingenious guitar riffs are better than Slayer!
Ministry is MY baby, I deserve all the cred!"
Said the drunken old wino to himself in his head…
“Fuck Scaccia, Fuck Reiflin, Fuck Connelly, Fuck Paul! Fuck Warner Brother Records, hey Fuck’em All!”
meh, thats all I got for now…
Says the man who flips burgers for a living!
i cant even be fucked reading that shit…i mean really…the 3 lines i read…did not impress…
Pete: that made my year. thank you.
-al
On a totally unrelated note, one of my friends sent me a message on MySpace with the subject “HAPPY HOLIDAYZ” containing nothing but the No W video.
Whether this is irony or not is wholly beyond my capacity at the mo.
Hangovers… I second the notion.
This whole Bush bashing thingis old. Boring. Stupid. Aren’t there more tjings to focus on as far as world politics? Sunni vs. Shiite, fundamentalists taking over (i am very upset and angry about Bhutto’s assassination though I’m still Musharraf all the way). What about African wars? Seems a low point to keep on hammering the same guy over and over ecen when the American people kept him in again. If one wants to convey a political statement and be taken seriously then do it seriously…
Pete that was hilarious though! I read the PA thread and it’s like ‘rad’, ‘awesome’. Ha - i’d like to see how many there can even point out Iran on a map. Being huge fans of ministry’s latest material, as many have stated there, implies that they are into politics since this is the theme of the latest albums, yet there is very little political
discussion there.
Hey, egh…I know when Iran is. Of course! It’s south of Chicago, right? …Or is that Boston. One of the two. LOLZ!
But yeah, I agree. The bush bashing has gotten old, but it’s been that way for years now. The happens in pakistan is a shame, and you’re absolutely right that there’s a lot more out there in the world rather than bashing just dubya and his buddies.
agreed. i was tired of bush oriented lyrics/etc after houses. i mean, al can write about whatever floats his goat, who am i to judge?
but me not judging doesn’t change the fact that i am totally dis-interested in hearing more anti-bush rhetoric. we know. he sucks. but if that’s what al is “inspired” to do, then i guess that’s what we’re getting. besides, i still have older ministry to keep me interested, right?
sigh
This whole Bush bashing thingis old. Boring. Stupid. Aren’t there more tjings to focus on as far as world politics? Sunni vs. Shiite, fundamentalists taking over (i am very upset and angry about Bhutto’s assassination though I’m still Musharraf all the way). What about African wars? Seems a low point to keep on hammering the same guy over and over ecen when the American people kept him in again. If one wants to convey a political statement and be taken seriously then do it seriously…
Pete that was hilarious though! I read the PA thread and it’s like ‘rad’, ‘awesome’. Ha - i’d like to see how many there can even point out Iran on a map. Being huge fans of ministry’s latest material, as many have stated there, implies that they are into politics since this is the theme of the latest albums, yet there is very little political
discussion there.
Were you at Neo, Afra? 
neo? Not in chicago presently…
What I want to know is…
What’s in the hookah?
1002
hey afra you’re right.
there are bigger concerns in the world than the weary tale of how dumb bush is.
let’s all get out our copies of the manchurian candidate,the frankenheimer movie from 1962 which is a great movie and scarey as all shit.
lets get our copies of “politics and the english language” , by orwell.
hey al make something that actually gets us excited.latching on to an established grievance is boring.
the people of pakistan are in utter turmoil.for instance.
the american primaries are coming up. if you’re so concerned as an artist or political junkie, GO. visit those early primary states instead of making these token ryhme schemes.
in case you didn’t know,
nobody rhymes anymore.
and in the current political climate, it’s not even funny.
What I want to know is…
What’s in the hookah?
1002
Mmmmm Hookah! I like the grape and the apple although i have to admit i haven’t smoked any in about 6 mos.
Late,
grmpysmrf