straight talk on drugs!

Discussion
1

Ok, so, I have a friend who is among that hardcore 10% of the population that could be clinically classified as an “addict” of weed (and any other psychedelics that come his way).

Said friend is one of my last remaining childhood friends that I’ve kept in touch with, as well as someone who introduced me to much of the music that we talk about on these boards.

Maybe because I looked up to him early on as an exemplar of what a ‘free spirit’ is supposed to be like, and never knew him to be at a loss for creativity, I’ve been complicit in letting him slide into a pathetic state of constant pot-fueled laziness.
Somebody who I once knew to be more spontaneous and inventive than 99.9% of the population is now so predictable, that the only real surprises left for me are what strain of weed he’ll be smoking today and which Xbox game he’ll be playing to accompany the ride. He will do a lot of things that seem to him like enlightened curveballs that could only be thrown by a seasoned dope master; but are themselves very tiring (does anyone else think that using hippie puns like “whirled peas,” or re-fried Temple of Psychick Youth jargon, is the sign of a higher intelligence? Didn’t think so).

So, given that I was a dumbass many years ago and kind of encouraged this state of affairs, I feel it’s partially my responsibility to see if I can still help him out. While, on a whole, I prefer lazy dope-smokers to non-lazy activists who want to force everyone else to fit into their belief system, I also feel sad seeing somebody’s potential completely flushed down the toilet. I hate calling ol’ boy up and hearing, for the thousandth time, about the novel that he’s finally getting around to starting on and knowing full well that he’s never going to do it until he recognizes he’s stagnating and that the sticky icky is just an amplifier of his laziness rather than a portal to creativity.

So does anyone else have any successful experience in gradually getting a friend to taper off of addictive substances (regardless of whether they’d be considered ‘soft’ or ‘hard’ drugs)? Any recommendations for how to help out a devoutly non-religious guy who wants nothing to do with AA-type programs, and furthermore has almost zero contact with individuals that don’t reinforce his beliefs and “enable” him?
Am happy to hear any and all ideas.

2

Sounds like some experiences I’ve had several times. I wish I had a better answer for you, but when you outgrow your friends, I don’t think there’s any great options. You can’t control the guy, and just about anything you tell him will come across as harshing his free spirit buzz. I’ve always been pretty straight edge, and had many friends in high school and college fall prey to the same thing you describe. It broke my heart, because they were (and are) great guys. But all of a sudden, pharmacology becomes their only interest. And when you don’t have any common interests anymore, it’s hard to keep a friendship at the same level. You can (and should) stay friends with him, but probably spend less time with him and more with other friends who are at the same maturity level. And be ready to help him find his way if he figures it out. But there’s really not an intervention-ish thing you can do that would have any effect unless he really sees he has a problem and wants to change. Sorry I don’t have better advice, but I’ve been in that situation 3 or 4 times and never tried anything that worked.

3

Personally, I don’t think pot is addictive. I think there a part of your buddy that the pot brings out. I think if your buddy was drinking heavily or doing heroin or coke you’d have a much more addictive situation. Your buddy could also just be depressed. Also, I don’t think you should feel like your encouraged him. He’s his own person. You may just need to keep your distance from him.

5

Hey gang -

thanks much for the insightful replies. It is a tricky situation, because all the stuff you normally would do to modify someone’s behavior - like giving incentives / rewards for progress - don’t really work when those incentives are always associated with being accompaniment for smoking up. You know, I can’t go out and say ‘I’ll buy you a heap of new records’ because I don’t think he can remember the last time he wasn’t using records as the catalyst for an afternoon of dope lethargy.

I agree that it may just be time to move on, honestly. I hate having to give people an “it’s me or the dope” ultimatum, but there may be no other way.

We’re not in the same city anymore but I invited him down to Austin for a brief spell. I have no drug connections here and he won’t either, so if he can make it through the trip without freaking out then maybe there’s still some hope. Will take him to some shows and other events and just hope for the best.

7

I hate “marijuana culture”.
It’s so stupid.
Honestly, I probably hate lazy hippie dirtbags more than legit junkies. They’re just . . . uggh. So nauseating.
I find them so tedious that I even hate the so-called “medical marijuana” stuff (99.99% of the licensed medical pot users have absolutely NOTHING that actually needs treatment by weed). At least back in the day cops could whack these fuckers with a stick and write them tickets and such.

I don’t even know what the law is anymore.

Sorry, I guess none of that was at all remotely helpful or insightful. I just got reminded of more stuff that I hate.

8

I hate “marijuana culture”.
It’s so stupid.
Honestly, I probably hate lazy hippie dirtbags more than legit junkies. They’re just . . . uggh. So nauseating.
I find them so tedious that I even hate the so-called “medical marijuana” stuff (99.99% of the licensed medical pot users have absolutely NOTHING that actually needs treatment by weed). At least back in the day cops could whack these fuckers with a stick and write them tickets and such.

I don’t even know what the law is anymore.

Sorry, I guess none of that was at all remotely helpful or insightful. I just got reminded of more stuff that I hate.

Hahaha well - I’m not at the point yet where I wish for stoners to be run over with tanks, but I also don’t think that easy access to psychotropic drugs is going to be the magic key that takes humans to the farthest star.

William Burroughs once said that dreams are only about as interesting as the dreamer, and so I think the same applies to any kind of recreational drug. People have to really take an inventory of who they are and what they want before they get into all this stuff, rather than expecting it to do all the work for them, and that’s where I’m probably on the same level with you in terms of being pissed off at “marijuana culture.” Too many people use its origins as a shamanic, visionary plant to give some kind of legitimacy to completely retarded…cough…Juggaloes…cough…behavior.

I used to think along these lines (you know, thinking “if everyone just tripped balls once, everyone would realize their essential meaninglessness in the grand scheme of the universe and people would be more humble and peaceful etc.”) It’s just that I evolved out of that sort of messianic attitude to psychedelics whereas Friend X has been hanging out there for the last 30 odd years.

On a final note, my most recent experience with today’s psychedelics left me feeling that they are way, way more potent than what was being marketed a couple decades ago. I read in one medical journal that the newer synthetic cannabinoids are “non-selective agonists” which means those molecules bind to receptors in a way that makes them 2-100 (!!!) times more powerful than regular THC molecules.

9

I’v dealt with the same situation with a family member. Said loved one smokes pot constantly and you can tell how it changes people.

Like another poster mentioned, pot culture is so fucking retarded, all these little stoner motherfuckers make me cringe, and although I don’t consider pot a real drug its quite frustrating to see a loved one blazed outta their mind every single day.
It’s like… they’re not causing any real harm to themselves but is that the kinda person you wanna be? Never being grounded always being high? Their answer would prob be yes.

All I can say is this. . .

Let em be. You cant change someone. So i wouldn’t bother trying to talk sense into him. Accept him for what he is.

10

The title of this thread cracks me up every time. It just sounds so 80’s. It seems like it would be one of those free “Resource” videos that they’d have at the VHS rental places. Like “Scott Baio Presents: STRAIGHT TALK ON DRUGS!” or something. And in between sessions of straight talk there would probably be some fun singing and dancing from K.I.D.S Inc. or something.

11

And in between sessions of straight talk there would probably be some fun singing and dancing from K.I.D.S Inc. or something.

I thought I was the only one left on the planet that remembers that show! LOL

12

The title of this thread cracks me up every time. It just sounds so 80’s. It seems like it would be one of those free “Resource” videos that they’d have at the VHS rental places. Like “Scott Baio Presents: STRAIGHT TALK ON DRUGS!” or something. And in between sessions of straight talk there would probably be some fun singing and dancing from K.I.D.S Inc. or something.

Haha this was more or less what I was aiming for. If only a had a Z-list 80s celebrity to “present” the thread for me, too.

On a vaguely related topic, this has inspired me to add Mr. T’s immortal [url https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7uixiYRtmM]“Don’t Talk to Strangers” into what I call the “no, seriously, we’re closing…get out” part of my next DJ setlist.

14

https://youtu.be/CwXU1JavXnc?t=4

16

Based on my personal experience and that of friends and acquaintances, habitual pot use is a sign of filling a void of something missing in life or as a means to avoid an issue of some kind.

Find out which of the two it is and try to talk to him about it. Friends have to be confrontational sometimes if they truly want to help someone out. It’s not easy and could actually ruin your relationship. On the other hand, he may be grateful you give a shit. It may spark some self reflection on his part. And ultimately, he may hate you for harshing his buzz, but deep down I think he’d appreciate that you care.

17

Based on my personal experience and that of friends and acquaintances, habitual pot use is a sign of filling a void of something missing in life or as a means to avoid an issue of some kind.

Well it’s one good thing that I did grow up with dudebro, so I do know exactly what types of things would cause him to seek out chemical compensation.

He always insists that what he’s doing as a celebration of life in general, some sort of sacramental thing if you will. But that brings up the arguing point for me: what exactly are you celebrating? The second you come down again you’re a cranky and whiny shit looking for the worst in everyone. That doesn’t seem to me like using pot etc. to consummate a contented relationship with life. Seems more like - as ya say - having a nice dark cave to retreat into while waiting for the storm to blow over.

Find out which of the two it is and try to talk to him about it. Friends have to be confrontational sometimes if they truly want to help someone out. It’s not easy and could actually ruin your relationship. On the other hand, he may be grateful you give a shit. It may spark some self reflection on his part. And ultimately, he may hate you for harshing his buzz, but deep down I think he’d appreciate that you care.

Well I did make good on your advice, and tried having a chat where I was more confrontational in general without just being an accusatory jerk. Not very easy for me.

At one point there was an expected attempt to ‘turn the tables on me’ by mentioning that I’ve published articles in favor of drug use. He was referencing a piece called ‘Twilight of Psychedelic America’ that I wrote years ago, saying how hypocritical it was that I’d come down on him after ‘promoting’ unfettered drug use in another forum.

The thing is, I DIDN’T. The article in question was discussing how and where psychedelic culture in the U.S. went wrong, and could have been written now as a criticism of the very lifestyle my friend is living. I discussed how irreverent, uninformed, and (last but not least) casual attitudes towards the life-altering potential of psychedelics had made the hallucinogenic subculture into a toothless joke.

So that nearly convinced me to give up and let him just go his own way. The book I gave him containing that article was limited to so few copies that I don’t even have one anymore; it was a gift given with the intent that it would give him some food for thought and broaden horizons (there are many other articles in there more interesting than mine). It really pissed me off knowing that it was never even read; if it was used at all the hardcover probably came in handy for rolling joints.

Anyway, this is still a work in progress. But as it stands now all the people who said ‘you can’t change people’ are being proven right.

18

Well the sad thing is that we often have to move on from friends. But if you spoke your mind and were honest, you should be able to move on with a clear conscience. I know in the past I’ve abandoned “friends” for the very reasons you described, but have later wished I had at least said something.

19

Bottom line in all this is he wont stop until hes ready to stop and no doubt he wont be able to do it on his own so at the very least be around when he needs help stopping.

20

Medical marijuana should be paid attention to. It helped my Grandfather with his pain and appetite during his battle with cancer. Sorry to go “off topic” with this, but someone brought it up in a negative light, so there you go. If you want, keep on drinking your fucking beer and shut the fuck up unless you know the facts - not the facts on the internet, but the people who are sick and need it. Now, enjoy your beer…

22

I think there’s absolutely a case for some people getting medical marijuana but I suspect those people with real issues such as cancer make up 1-3% of people getting medical marijuana. Just walk down the boardwalk in Venice Beach or see the 420 Billboards and you’ll see these are not the people who are being advertised to.

Honestly I believe in legalization even though I find pot personally lame. I also think alcohol is lame so I realize my ideas on what is cool aren’t mainstream.

24

I’m not ready to legalize it

Seriously? Take a look at colorado; overflowing with money, teen use is down, and theres a whole subculture of markets that have opened up (medicinal testing that have shown signs of it fighting Alzheimer’s, Chrohns disease and a whole host of other problems) Legalize it. With all of the different strains out there, legalizing brings regulation so people know exactly what theyre getting now instead of when they go buy from Evan the pot dealer.

25

Evan is a good guy and knows his product.
Know your shit and don’t just believe what you read on the Internet, Grumps!

26

Evan is a good guy and knows his product.
Know your shit and don’t just believe what you read on the Internet, Grumps!

Nice [laugh]