I’ll start:
Tori Amos
Sharon Osbourne
Brendan Fraser
Baz Luhrman
Will Smith and his entire family
Steven Tyler
George Lucas
Julia Gillard (Australian Prime Minister)
Kevin Rudd (ex Australian Prime Minister)
Tim Robbins
Tiger Woods
Sarah Hanson Young (Australian Greens Party politician)
Nicole Kidman
and YES…you CAN nominate both women and children!!
Nobody is safe from this thread!
Fire away!
Living only or are we also allowed to punch dead people and historical figures? I’ll start with a few living people whose skulls I would like to put a fist-sized hole into.
John Travolta
Rosie O’Donnel
Donald Trump
Charlie Sheen
Kathy Griffin
Geddy Lee
Gallagher
Jennifer Aniston
There’s about a million people I want to punch but I’m drawing a blank tonight. This list will be a work in progress for me.
There’s about a million people I want to punch but I’m drawing a blank tonight. This list will be a work in progress for me.
As soon as I started this thread I thought to myself:
I can think of at least one person here who’s going to have a field day with this.
Oh…and I almost forgot…
Lars Ulrich
Living only or are we also allowed to punch dead people and historical figures?
MUST be living.
And who is Gallagher?! Liam Gallagher?
What a great thread Peligro, hats off to you dude!!
Most of the people I want to punch are politicians
Top of the list. (let you all know if I get a visit from secret service… It’s against the law threaten death to a sitting or former president but I’m not advocating that for the top two or anyone on this list)
Dick Cheney
George W
Sean Hannity/Bill O’Reilly (tied for 3rd I can’t decide who is worse)
(Since it’s limited to living Reagan is out)
Rush
Fred Phelps deserves a knock to the head
Pat Robertson
Antonin Scalia
Michelle Bachman and her stupid husband.
Newt
and tom cruise
and I second kathy griffith
Liam gallagher is the dude from Oasis. But “gallagher” was a comedian here whose schtick was to smash watermelons with a mallet
Late,
grmpysmrf
Stephen Morrissey and tell him to get laid
Al Jourgensen FOR OBVIOUS REASONS
Katy Perry just because
Bella from Twilight for bad acting
Robert Pattenson(Edward from Twilight) while I’m wearing my Lost Boys shirt with Kiefer on the front with the phrase Be One Of Us underneath him
Jacob from Twilight for disgracing werewolves
Lionel Richie for a good laugh
Uma Thurman for having ugly feet
Gene Simmons for sueing King Diamond and for being an overall prick
Paul Stanley for general principles
The no name guitarist of the current lineup of KISS for having the nerve to wear Ace’s makeup
Mark Slaughter because I wish I can sing like him
Every single one of the Backstreet Boys for existing
Slipknot for existing (I’d even dig up Paul Grey for that one)
And finally, Chuck Norris because he wouldn’t feel a thing and hit me with a roundhouse kick afterwards.
I can’t believe I forgot Gene Simmons. I despise that piece of crap and could probably write a full novel on all the different reasons I loathe him and want him to choke on his own tongue and drop dead.
I also want to punch Hugh Hefner with full vigor and watch his mummified head explode into a cloud of dust.
Oh yes! Great thread! I’m in a head punching mood!!
Steven Dorff (actor)
Lydia Lunch
M Night Shyamalan
Tommy Lee
Lars Ulrich
Bono
Chris Martin (Coldplay)
Glenn Benton
Kevin Spacey
Simon Cowell (X Factor judge)
Venus Williams (tennis player)
Andy Roddick (tennis player)
and too many Aussie musicians to mention
I also want to punch Hugh Hefner with full vigor and watch his mummified head explode into a cloud of dust.
That’s jealousy talking right there!!
Late,
grmpysmrf
Also, the lead singer of that band Live. Don’t know his name.
You know who I mean.
Yeah, Bro. I know who you mean.
M Night Shyamalan
I’ll add this fucker to my list too! he needs a good wollup
Kevin Spacey
but scratch my head at this guy. Spacey is great!
Late,
grmpysmrf
I’m not jealous of Hugh Hefner. I am honestly and truly repulsed by him. I hate the way people fawn over him and haven’t the decency to call him what he is . . . . a delusional dirty old bastard. I wouldn’t care if the guy just said, “Yeah, I’m an old pervert and I plan to die surrounded by a bunch of fresh young sluts old enough to be my great granddaughters.”
But he keeps “falling in love” and making a big showing that he can have committed relationships and so forth. He keeps getting engaged and then people act like they feel bad for getting his heart broken when the 21 year old bride to be realizes she’s about to make union with the Cryptkeeper and runs away.
He’s such a goon. And I’m proud to tell y’all that while I’ve not had the joy of punching him, I did get the opportunity to make fun of him on live radio.
This was probably about 6 years ago. There was a talk radio host down here called Tom Leykis who was a greasy fat blowhard who would talk all about scoring with women and telling guys how to “get more tail for less money”. The host was a giant turd but I listened because a. I liked hearing the anal prudes get all bent out of shape and call in crying about the show, and b. I liked to call in regularly by faking my way past the screeners and then busting his balls on the air for my own amusement.
When he had a special show broadcasting live from the Playboy mansion I couldn’t resist the opportunity and they had asked if any callers wanted to ask a question of Hugh Hefner. Of course everyone was calling in and kissing ass. I faked my way through the screeners telling them what my question was and was shortly put through live on the air with Hugh Hefner.
I asked, “Who have you really wanted to get to be in Playboy but haven’t gotten yet?” He babbled some nonsense about "Well, we just always want to put in who our readers want to see . . . " blah blah blah. As he finished, I said, “Hey, Mr. Hefner, I have one more question” “Yes?” “Which is better for helping you poop? Metamucil or Prune Juice? You wrinkly old bastard!!!” Both the host and Heffner were obviously shaken and there was a combination of awkward silence followed by fumbling . . . “Uhh, yeah, sorry about that, Hugh. We try to screen those people out but every once in a while one slips through.” and Hugh mumbled something about “Immature people”. It was awesome.
I hate the way people fawn over him and haven’t the decency to call him what he is . . . . a delusional dirty old bastard.
I don’t think the guy is delusional at all he knows he’s an old pervert who plans to die surrounded by a bunch of fresh young sluts old enough to be his great granddaughters… what’s not to like about the guy?
I wouldn’t care if the guy just said, “Yeah, I’m an old pervert and I plan to die surrounded by a bunch of fresh young sluts old enough to be my great granddaughters.”
I’m pretty sure that this is one of his actual quotes…
But he keeps “falling in love” and making a big showing that he can have committed relationships and so forth. He keeps getting engaged and then people act like they feel bad for getting his heart broken when the 21 year old bride to be realizes she’s about to make union with the Cryptkeeper and runs away.
yeah cause shallow superficial women leave skid marks running away from money. he throws those chicks away like kleenex. good job ugly old rich bastard!!!
He’s such a goon. And I’m proud to tell y’all that while I’ve not had the joy of punching him, I did get the opportunity to make fun of him on live radio.
while I still call you on jealousy i gotta award you the bass ass award for putting it on air. I can’t wait for this story.
This was probably about 6 years ago. There was a talk radio host down here called Tom Leykis
I remember this guy…
who was a greasy fat blowhard who would talk all about scoring with women and telling guys how to “get more tail for less money”. The host was a giant turd but I listened because a. I liked hearing the anal prudes get all bent out of shape and call in crying about the show, and b. I liked to call in regularly by faking my way past the screeners and then busting his balls on the air for my own amusement.
outstanding
When he had a special show broadcasting live from the Playboy mansion I couldn’t resist the opportunity and they had asked if any callers wanted to ask a question of Hugh Hefner. Of course everyone was calling in and kissing ass. I faked my way through the screeners telling them what my question was and was shortly put through live on the air with Hugh Hefner.
I asked, “Who have you really wanted to get to be in Playboy but haven’t gotten yet?” He babbled some nonsense about "Well, we just always want to put in who our readers want to see . . . " blah blah blah. As he finished, I said, “Hey, Mr. Hefner, I have one more question” “Yes?” “Which is better for helping you poop? Metamucil or Prune Juice? You wrinkly old bastard!!!” Both the host and Heffner were obviously shaken and there was a combination of awkward silence followed by fumbling . . . “Uhh, yeah, sorry about that, Hugh. We try to screen those people out but every once in a while one slips through.” and Hugh mumbled something about “Immature people”. It was awesome.
Fucking brilliant!!! ba ba buey ba ba buey howard rules!!!
Late,
grmpysmrf
The no name guitarist of the current lineup of KISS for having the nerve to wear Ace’s makeup
brilliant
Liam gallagher is the dude from Oasis. But “gallagher” was a comedian here whose schtick was to smash watermelons with a mallet
Late,
grmpysmrf
About 8 years back a client of mine had tickets for a Gallagher show at The Grove Theatre in Anaheim but wasn’t able to attend so he gave them to me and I took my wife.
We were easily the youngest couple in attendance and the audience consisted almost solely of 50-60 year old lame ass middle-class WHITE PEOPLE. Before the show started Gallagher was setting up his props and checking the stage from the floor and someone went up to him to shake his hand or ask for an autograph or something and he was all cranky and snapped, yapping something about going back to his table to meet people.
He started making his way to the foyer and I had nothing better to do so I followed the short train of people drafting behind him to get a chance to meet the great Gallagher. He sat at his table and was just about the most bitter ornery old bastard I’ve ever seen. One family wanted a photo with him and he got all pissed at them “No! You stand there! Hurry up! Take the photo!”
I had my ticket and was just going to have him sign it and say hi but when I got up to him I said, “Hi, Gallagher! I just wanted to let you know I voted for you” (Ref: 2003 Recall Election where CA got the Kindergarten Cop as our new Governor). I thought he’d get a chuckle and a smile from that or laugh and say “Thanks”, but his reaction really surprised me. He snapped back bitterly, as if he really thought his campaign was real and signified something, and angrily barked out something along the lines of “Yeah! 20,000 people voted for me!” or something.
I looked straight at him and said, “Yeah, you got beaten by a porn star, a crippled smut peddler, and the midget from Different Strokes.” I could see him turning red with rage and I wasn’t even sure what was going to happen. Was he going to hit me? Call security? Fire back some hot zinger of an insult? He was at a loss and none of those came my way. Instead he just waved his arm for me to go away as he shouted “Get out of the way! We gotta keep the line moving!”
His act that night was HORRIBLE. He did the exact jokes he’d told 20 years earlier. Exactly. Nothing new. Nothing original. And he just came across as angry and hateful as he bitched about how music these days suck and what’s up with the kids and Britney Spears and Paris Hilton and dumb amidst his iconic schtick. It was awful. I told my wife about the encounter we had before the show and mentioned that I wanted to mess with him again after the show, but she wasn’t having any of it and forbid me from any more shenanigans.
If not for the chance to bust his balls it would have been a pretty lame evening.
I also want to punch Bret Michaels. I want to punch him like one thousand times until he dies. And then I’d punch him a thousand times more.
And Corey Feldman also needs some serious punching. One good punch to the crotch, followed by two more. One for each eye.
[reply]
Liam gallagher is the dude from Oasis. But “gallagher” was a comedian here whose schtick was to smash watermelons with a mallet
Late,
grmpysmrf
About 8 years back a client of mine had tickets for a Gallagher show at The Grove Theatre in Anaheim but wasn’t able to attend so he gave them to me and I took my wife.
We were easily the youngest couple in attendance and the audience consisted almost solely of 50-60 year old lame ass middle-class WHITE PEOPLE. Before the show started Gallagher was setting up his props and checking the stage from the floor and someone went up to him to shake his hand or ask for an autograph or something and he was all cranky and snapped, yapping something about going back to his table to meet people.
He started making his way to the foyer and I had nothing better to do so I followed the short train of people drafting behind him to get a chance to meet the great Gallagher. He sat at his table and was just about the most bitter ornery old bastard I’ve ever seen. One family wanted a photo with him and he got all pissed at them “No! You stand there! Hurry up! Take the photo!”
I had my ticket and was just going to have him sign it and say hi but when I got up to him I said, “Hi, Gallagher! I just wanted to let you know I voted for you” (Ref: 2003 Recall Election where CA got the Kindergarten Cop as our new Governor). I thought he’d get a chuckle and a smile from that or laugh and say “Thanks”, but his reaction really surprised me. He snapped back bitterly, as if he really thought his campaign was real and signified something, and angrily barked out something along the lines of “Yeah! 20,000 people voted for me!” or something.
I looked straight at him and said, “Yeah, you got beaten by a porn star, a crippled smut peddler, and the midget from Different Strokes.” I could see him turning red with rage and I wasn’t even sure what was going to happen. Was he going to hit me? Call security? Fire back some hot zinger of an insult? He was at a loss and none of those came my way. Instead he just waved his arm for me to go away as he shouted “Get out of the way! We gotta keep the line moving!”
His act that night was HORRIBLE. He did the exact jokes he’d told 20 years earlier. Exactly. Nothing new. Nothing original. And he just came across as angry and hateful as he bitched about how music these days suck and what’s up with the kids and Britney Spears and Paris Hilton and dumb amidst his iconic schtick. It was awful. I told my wife about the encounter we had before the show and mentioned that I wanted to mess with him again after the show, but she wasn’t having any of it and forbid me from any more shenanigans.
If not for the chance to bust his balls it would have been a pretty lame evening.[/reply]
you shoulda started saying the punch lines with him during the show!!! like you do when you’ve seen a movie too many times. Yeah, I’ve heard he’s a bit of an ass now that he’s no longer the “it” comedian. “beat by a porn star and a smut peddler” brilliant!
Late,
grmpysmrf
You know that guy on that show who walks around all high and mighty acting like he knows so much? He needs a punch in the face…
Peter Jennings!
Perez Hilton
Michael Stipe
Jody Foster
Skrillex
Kelsey Grammar
John Malkovich