Ministry will put out an album decrying US president George W Bush as “The Great Satan”. It will be fast and thrashy. Piss Army members will lap it up. Rest of world will be outraged. Or not.
Eminem will add to his already controversial status by duetting with Osama Bin Laden on the track ‘Nuke This Joint’. It will go platinum. The feds will catch on to the irony of the situation a little too late however and arrive on the scene only to find Eminem eating a hotdog and proclaiming “Sorry, ya just missed him”. D’oh.
The lyrics on the new Tool album will answer the age old rhetorical question: why are we here? It will have something to do with quantum physics.
The Cure will put out yet another album minus anything that even remotely resembles a tune. But sales of eyeliner across the globe will sky-rocket.
Noise music will become the new nu-metal. Merzbow will adorn the front cover of Spin magazine. Looking confused.
Skinny Puppy will break up again, stating unhappily that “Nobody gets it!”. What ‘it’ is however will remain undecided.
According to critics, Morrissey will put out “the greatest album released since The Queen Is Dead”. Then some bright spark will point out that The Queen Is Dead really wasn’t that great to begin with and panic will ensue.
Franz Ferdinand will go into hiding after one of the group foolishly makes an off-handed comment about Islam. Muslim clerics will denounce them and call for their deaths. A spokesman for the band will call for calm and ensure the general public that they “didn’t really mean it” and have since given up eating pork.
After an earthquake devastates much of downtown Los Angeles, unsold copies of Courtney Love’s ‘Americas Sweetheart’ will be used as land fill to plug holes throughout the city. Courtney is praised for her actions and responds by selling her face on eBay.
Guns N Roses will finally release ‘Chinese Democracy’…ok ok I’m just kidding. Sheesh! It’s always funny until someone takes it too far.
Number 10 is going to happen this year I think. Maybe not the rumored March, but I would definately not rule out May or June. 2 and 1/2 songs have leaked this week. All three are pretty damn good to be honest. I don’t think the leaks of ‘IRS’ and ‘There was a Time (TWAT)’ are finished product. But the minute and a 1/2 of ‘Better’ is very well produced and seems like a clip that would be sent out to promote the CD like the clips for the last NIN disc.
Anyway, if you can find them (god knows its easy enough) I think you guys might like them. I know I was impressed. I saw Axl on the last tour and have been really really excited about this CD. Download a live version of ‘Chinese Democracy’, it rocks like old school White Zombie. Anyway, that is my two cents.
There is also going to be a new Slayer album too! Yay!
And The Cure? Yeah, the last couple of albums kinda sucked. Self titled was terrible. ANd this is coming from someone who owns twelve Cure albums and ten (vinyl) singles.
Regarding Chinese Democracy…I don’t understand why people would get excited over a band like Guns N Roses? What a bunch of hick, heavy metal wannabees! Awful, ugly talentless band. And their fans are even worse. Sad thing is, the album will be huge I’ll bet and Axl will once again become a demigod to millions. What a strange universe it is that we inhabit.
Ministry/RevCo
Satriani
Queensyrche
RUSH (maybe 2007)
Gune N Roses (the three leaks tunes…so far so good)
Manson w skold
King Diamond
Killing Joke
VAST
Number 10 is going to happen this year I think. Maybe not the rumored March, but I would definately not rule out May or June. 2 and 1/2 songs have leaked this week. All three are pretty damn good to be honest. I don’t think the leaks of ‘IRS’ and ‘There was a Time (TWAT)’ are finished product. But the minute and a 1/2 of ‘Better’ is very well produced and seems like a clip that would be sent out to promote the CD like the clips for the last NIN disc.
Anyway, if you can find them (god knows its easy enough) I think you guys might like them. I know I was impressed. I saw Axl on the last tour and have been really really excited about this CD. Download a live version of ‘Chinese Democracy’, it rocks like old school White Zombie. Anyway, that is my two cents.
Sould seek?? are you on there? Can you point me in a direction of a user? I’m really curiose? Are they all as crappy as “OH MY GOD”?
Late,
grmpysmrf
Regarding Chinese Democracy…I don’t understand why people would get excited over a band like Guns N Roses?
Nobody does anymore
What a bunch of hick, heavy metal wannabees! Awful, ugly talentless band.
Slash Has Talent!!
And their fans are even worse.
I’m not a heavy metal hick wanna be
Sad thing is, the album will be huge I’ll bet and Axl will once again become a demigod to millions
I doubt it. I think Everyone is interested in seeing what kind of collosal failure the album is going to be with out Slash or Izzy there. not only that, the music isn’t even heavy metal any more or rock or whatever it’s genre was. It’s pseudo NIN NCH NAILS. A Copy of something that’s already not that great?? bound to be the best comedy album around once it’s release!!
Late,
grmpysmrf
I would definitely give Slash credit as a guitarist (hell, the guy can release hard rock and smooth jazz and be successful), and whether you liked GNR or not, Appetite For Destruction is a legitimate rock album. Yeah, we’re all sick of Paradise City, but nothing can be worse than that overblown piece of shit called November Rain. That song was as bad as a Meat Loaf epic. I don’t give GNR much credit after that. I think they started strong and faded fast. Axl’s big mistake is holding on to the GNR label. He should’ve moved on to something else years ago.
I would definitely give Slash credit as a guitarist (hell, the guy can release hard rock and smooth jazz and be successful), and whether you liked GNR or not, Appetite For Destruction is a legitimate rock album. Yeah, we’re all sick of Paradise City, but nothing can be worse than that overblown piece of shit called November Rain. That song was as bad as a Meat Loaf epic. I don’t give GNR much credit after that. I think they started strong and faded fast. Axl’s big mistake is holding on to the GNR label. He should’ve moved on to something else years ago.
1002
I LOVE the solo’s in November Rain! Talk as much shit as you want about that song There are some redeeming qualities to it! (Unlike Paradise City- I agree SICK OF IT!)
Late,
grmpysmrf
Number 10 is going to happen this year I think. Maybe not the rumored March, but I would definately not rule out May or June. 2 and 1/2 songs have leaked this week. All three are pretty damn good to be honest. I don’t think the leaks of ‘IRS’ and ‘There was a Time (TWAT)’ are finished product. But the minute and a 1/2 of ‘Better’ is very well produced and seems like a clip that would be sent out to promote the CD like the clips for the last NIN disc.
Anyway, if you can find them (god knows its easy enough) I think you guys might like them. I know I was impressed. I saw Axl on the last tour and have been really really excited about this CD. Download a live version of ‘Chinese Democracy’, it rocks like old school White Zombie. Anyway, that is my two cents.
All I can find is live shit on SOULSEEK and it all sounds like crap!
Late,
grmpysmrf
Ministry will put out an album decrying US president George W Bush as “The Great Satan”. It will be fast and thrashy. Piss Army members will lap it up. Rest of world will be outraged. Or not.
I wonder if Christian groups will protest the artwork? It reminds me alot of the Dead Kennedy’s ‘Give Me Convenience…’ sleeve.
I wonder if Christian groups will protest the artwork? It reminds me alot of the Dead Kennedy’s ‘Give Me Convenience…’ sleeve.
Really? Give me Convienence? With Kennedy’s mouth all barbed wired up? are you sure your not equating them just cause they are both black and white photos? I don’t see it, son!
Late,
grmpysmrf
Olsen, think you’re thinking of DK’s “In God We Trust, Inc.” album sleeve. With Christ crucified on a cross made of money. “Give Me Convenience or Give Me Death” has no religious connections that I can see.