We had a male secretary who was former Army. He went back to uni for an engineering degree and joined the department as an AST.
Thanks for dashing my hopes…
First. I’m asked to do that shit almost weekly. I co teach with a woman and she asks me to do that stuff. Not cause im a woman or im lesser (i actually have more teaching credentials than she) but because its shit that needs to get done. Second perhaps youre asked to do that shit because your capable and not because youre a woman. Getting all pissy about doing what you deem woman’s work doesnt help the stigma of gender roles… or maybe you think that work is beneath you because your an engineer like all the other men?
Way to go Smrfy, invalidating my experience and the experiences of my female friends having to work four times harder and smarter to be respected as engineers vs it being automatically given to our male counterparts from the very beginning.
Do you know the number one reason why women leave engineering even after masters degrees? It’s extremely unwelcoming, much like gaming and game design is also unwelcoming to women.
Each scenario with the exception of the last was made with derogatory intent and meant to put the female engineer in her place in the male-dominated office to see how far “the boys” could take it. You could say a form of harassment or hazing. Some men will go as far to try to get her fired or make her so miserable she leaves.
The last scenario I experienced, the Chief Engineer assumed because I was the female in the room wearing a dress that I wasn’t the Core Team SME and asked me why I hadn’t set up the Video conferencing room for him. I told him that I’m not the Secretary. He paused, quickly realized his faux pas, and apologized for his assumption.
One of the Lead Design Engineers HATES women on his design teams and is outwardly disrespectful. The Human Factors team member stopped me in the hall after a design meeting noting the drastic difference in the way he treated her as opposed to myself. So I told her how her works, how to earn his respect without having to work herself to death, and to not worry about it.
If my boss let me bake cookies at work, or especially if he ASKED for it, I’d get on my knees and thank God every day for this wonderful wormhole to Heaven that I somehow fell through. I sure wouldn’t complain about it… especially if I worked in the public sector and those cookies were paid for by the taxpayers, haha!
And, yeah, tagging onto Grumpy’s comments . . . perhaps some of us in the small business / private sector can relate a bit more personally, but a large portion (probably a majority, I guess) of us do not work in environments where we have special people assigned to get coffee, make copies, set up teleconferences, and bake cookies. With the exception of baking in the office (have ordered catering for meetings, bought donuts, etc.), I’ve do every one of the those tasks all the time (both on my own and by request) and I’ve never thought it was beneath me or that I was being disrespected for having to do it. Shit needs to get done, and we do it.
Invalidating your experiences? No not at all. I gave you my experience in the same situation with menial tasks. I gave a possible reason for such requests based on the information you provided.
Well, it would seem you have an uphill battle, then. You can either do something about it (which probably won’t be easy, but certainly not impossible) or simply exist in that culture and let it perpetuate.
Well, it sounds like documentation and a trip to HR is in order from the women in the office, and if HR is part of the problem then use some of that nice engineer money to hire a lawyer. There are always work arounds it’s just a matter of how much you want to fight for it. If all you’re gonna do is quietly complain don’t expect that shit change; you have to be proactive. You know this why am I telling you this?
If that’s what it is you’d be hard pressed to convince me it’s because youre a woman. Hazing goes on all of the time and it has nothing to do with gender, it has to do with the power dynamic. Doesnt make it right but it doesn’t make it sexist either. Shit, the last three hazing cases to hit the news have been dudes hazing other dudes which resulted in death.
HR is there for a reason, use it.
You said yourself Engineering is a male dominated field. He was playing the odds. AND he apologized after you told him his mistake. So why is it an issue? by your own admission you’re a bit of an anomaly in your field-
I don’t know what Core Team SME is.
It’s kinda like Gunnar’s situation using the clues at hand. If you got a beard and a mullet I’m gonna go ahead and choose “Sir.” When you correct me that it’s “Ma’am” I’ll apologize and move forward. Seems like that’s the EXACT situation here but with jobs and that’s exactly what the chief engineer did, apologize and move forward.
Ring ring
“Hello Human Resources how can I help you?”
“Yeah there’s this guy I work with…”
Well, it would stand to reason that if he hates women on his team then that would be impossible to do that now wouldn’t it? Perhaps it’s a specific type of worker he doesn’t like? and some happen to be women (but looks like all because there are so few at the job) Just because you haven’t seen a male worker draw his ire doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. In all honesty he just sounds like a prick.
That’s odd she would get that title when she works in an environment that clearly has a distain for women. I’m sure there could have been some man they could have given that title to instead.
I think that’s it for most of us.
Real friends are cool with us how we are.
If people give us shit for who we are or what we’re into, etc., fuck 'em.
It’s time for an upgrayedd.
LOL. So it just sounds important but really is not anything.
Speaking of working women. What’s your take on Biden picking a woman president for the sake of picking a woman. Seems kind of wrong to me. But whatever.
Is it so they can stay at home and play with their tits?
I think it’s disgusting display of pandering. I think the VP job should go to whomever is most qualified and wants it. If it happens to be a woman then so be it. But what a shit thing to do to the woman’s movement. If he wins (doubtful) then that woman VP will forever have an asterisk next to her name with *Chosen because she was a woman. Geraldine Ferrara wasn’t chosen because she was awoman but because she was a good running mate for Mondale
My wife shared with me some conspiracy theory that Biden is going to choose Hillary and if he wins then he will resign in 3 mos due to health reasons and Hilary will get to be the first woman pres anyway. Possible I guess, But I really think Hillary is the kiss of death in politics. Ultimately Biden can’t match Trumps intensity (?) as a speaker, bully, or an over promiser.
It rubs me the same way, actually, and I think it’s counterproductive to the grander struggle of women for him to present it like this. He should find the best PERSON for the job. And if that happens to be a woman, that’s great. They can then market it and play it accordingly . . . . “Our BEST candidate is a woman. We didn’t seek out a woman, but she rose to the top and we’re proud to have her on the team.”
But saying on the front end that you’re going to pick a woman as a running mate is really dumb, in my opinion, because it opens your team up for attack at later date and gives legitimacy to the people who will criticize. “She only got the job because she’s a woman!!!” Well, she might still be better than all the other candidates, but sadly the statement holds merit and everyone can argue that there were better candidates if he didn’t cut the applicant pool in half based solely on gender.
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I think the Covid-19 has ultimately locked the election for Trump.
First: I imagine voter turn out is going to be dismal and it’s no secret that when voter turnout is low Republicans do very well. That’s why republicans are always trying voter suppression tactics, kicking people off the rolls, spreading voter disinformation, and rolling back the voting rights act.
2nd: Now with Covid in place people are going to self suppress, but who are those people? The (for the most part) liberals progressives and democrats who believe this virus is a real threat will. Who is is not going to self suppress? The conservatives and republicans won’t because they think it’s all just nonsense and a different version of the flu. This election is already over based on what I expect will be the voter turnout. I don’t think Bernie can save it (I firmly believe Biden and or the DNC is cheating with the votes, Poll after Poll keeps showing Bernie whooping Trump’s ass and yet Biden keeps winning the primaries? Yeah right! I could be wrong could just be my bias for Bernie) just based on what I expect the numbers to be.
Yikes.
I’m glad I decided to take the plunge and toss my two cents into the arena here, but I’ve prolly done all I can.
I know what that means. 
Doesn’t mean ya gotta leave, bruh. Stick around and talk some shit. I actually have a couple things I wanna reply back to you with but I’m just being lazy with the longer posts right now. (I think it’s gonna be a long post, I’m not sure) fuck it I’ll do it now.
I don’t think anyone has made that accusation about the LGBTQ+ community (at least here on prongs). I hate/love affectionate displays the same whether it’s a hetero couple or gay couple. If you need to get a room you’re over doing it publicly no matter how you identify. If it’s hand holding or a quick peck or something then that’s sweet and carryon,
Coincidentally that seems to be the majority of trans women too. Well minus the cis gender thing.
This is definitely coming out of the right.
Fuck it dude, then just be!
That’s because it’s the overwhelming typical behavior for societies world wide. Flip the script and and make gay the overwhelming typical behavior and then hetero behavior would be in the same situation.
HAHA Unless you’re me and my wife and we run into it at Disneyland with dude already on bended knee with ring out and I proclaim while walking by “don’t do it dude run now while you still got the chance. run, run, run!” Then you’re scolded by your wife. 
That sucks, but you got to! You have to put up with it otherwise nothing changes. Gay public affection doesn’t become normal until it does and the only way to make it normal is ignore the backlash and make it seen. Granted it’s not going to be seen a lot because there aren’t really a lot of gay people out there. (I remember in college hearing that gay has always been 10% of the population (give or take) through out time. So going on that as a real stat, there isn’t really a big population of gay compared to the world pop numbers.)
I can tell you high school is definitely paving the way. There are several lesbian couples on campus and I’ve seen 2 gays couples holding hands in the hall and making out on the benches after school. So, it’s coming up. A lot of tolerant kids coming up.